To Wish Impossible Things
by writting is love
Summary: 2me this story holds mystery,drama,angst,romance of course it's a given,&adventure. Alright here's the summary: what if Rachel berry isn't what she seems? What if everything she had come to fear the most came true? Why did she leave Quinn? find out inside
1. To Wish Impossible Things Prologue

**I have been wanting to write something like this since hell I don't even know haha but anywho I watched Chuck today and was like yeah I have to do this like now. I know right now it seems mysterious, and way too short, but I swear I'll write more this is just the start well the warm up before the start [: I couldn't decide on the chapter name so I just mashed them up ;] remember me as a time of day is by explosions in the sky and nothing left but say but goodbye is by Audioslave and to wish impossible things is by the cure [:**

"**To Wish Impossible Things**" **Prologue ****Remember Me as a Time of Day because right now theirs Nothing Left To Say But Goodbye**

"Quinn I don't have much time." Rachel said feeling her nerves act up and heart do triple beats.

Quinn laughed smiling "Rach, don't be so dramatic we have the rest of our lives!"

_'Rachel hurry up.' _Rachel heard through her ear.

"In a minute." Rachel gritted turning her head slightly.

"Huh?" Quinn asked still smiling.

"Quinn-"

"Quinn! Berry! Hurry up!" Santana yelled with the rest of the group of students.

"Come on Rach!" Quinn giggled pulling Rachel's wrist in the rest of the group.

"Quinn their's something I need to tell you." Rachel said watching Quinn's excited face.

The crowd was anxious as the speaker started talking.

"Quinn, please I have to tell you now."

"Rach what's wrong?" Quinn asked noticing how Rachel's face was serious and sad.

Rachel took a hold of Quinn's face bringing her in a deep heart passionate kiss. Quinn quickly parted her lips she had been waiting for this for years now.

Rachel pulled back leaving Quinn in a daze as the Mr Shue yelled "Congratulations class of 2012! You did it!"

As everyone threw their hats in the air letting the pair go unnoticed.

"Quinn, always remember I love you."

The crowd pulled them apart cheering in joy, except for Rachel who took in all of Quinn one last time knowing full and well they would never see each other again.

Quinn had gotten lost in the crowd, and when she turned her head for what seemed like a second, and when she turned back.

Rachel was gone.


	2. Catastrophe and The Cure

**Okay so hopefully this is long enough to make up for lost time. Oh by the way the characters in this story like Sarah Walker is played by Yvonne Strahovski, and John Casey is played by Adam Baldwin, and Jill is played by Jordana Brewster. **

**Four Minutes everybody knows as Madonna and J.T.**

**Smack my bitch up is by the prodigy.**

**"To Wish Impossible Things" Chapter one 'Four Minutes to Smack my Bitch up'**

_'Rachel, do you copy?'_

"I read you loud and clear." Rachel whispered standing in line at the bank.

_'Good now when I say-'_

"Ra..Rachel? Rachel Berry?" Rachel froze that voice. That voice she thought she would never hear again.

_'Are you comprimized Rachel?'_

"Yes." Rachel said in the back of her throat trying to ignore the fact Quinn Fabray was calling her name.

_'Rachel move now! The door is wide open remember to drop the phone in the trash!' _

Rachel swiftly walked to the trash can throwing away her phone, then made her way to the open stairwell.

"Rachel!" Quinn called out again.

Rachel started shredding her clothes leaving her all in black. In a black leather jacket skinny jeans, and converse.

Quinn was confused and her heart was racing she thought Rachel had died. At least that's what all the detectives she had hired had told her, since they couldn't ever find anything on the brunnete. Quinn had left for the Berry's house, but it was completely empty. Everything was gone. She had asked the neighbors but apparently they had left in the middle of the night.

Quinn never stopped searching especially when Puck had died of AIDS and everyone was at his funeral. She had saw Rachel standing by a secluded stone wall staring right back at her wearing all black. Quinn had ran to her, but when she stood were she swore she saw Rachel standing the girl was gone. Leaving behind a white rose. Everyone had started to believe Rachel was dead since she had completely vanished off the face of the Earth. Santana would tell and pleaded with Quinn to move on, but Quinn knew better. She remembered when she had told Rachel white roses were her favorite because of how they were so beautiful and graceful. That was when Quinn knew the girl had to be alive she just had to be. Quinn would have felt it in her bones, her heart if Rachel had died. Quinn's heart fell why did Rachel leave? Was she in some sort of trouble? Every damn day Quinn would think of Rachel. Wondering where she was and if she thought of her too; or even missed her.

"Rachel! Rachel please! Please stop!" Quinn cried out as she raced down stairs only to find clothing scattered everywhere.

_'Rachel get rid of her.' _

"I'm trying Casey!" Rachel yelled. "Quick Casey which way is the bar?"

_'Right!'_

Rachel stopped at the door took a deep breath then walked inside.

"Ahhh Carmichael how nice to see you again." A Russian man said sitting in a chair.

"Volken, you have what I'm looking for." Rachel said gruffly.

Quinn watched silently from the creak in the door.

"Yes well as do you."

Quinn squealed as a large beefy man picked her up roughly charging into the bar.

"It's a set up!" He yelled.

Rachel's eyes widened looking at Quinn.

"Do you know her?" Volken asked.

"No." Rachel replied seeing the hurt in Quinn's eyes as the tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Really? Well then Goerge go ahead." Volken gestured as the man smirked before pulling on Quinn.

Rachel growled busting out her guns in each hand one on Volken and the other she shot at George making Quinn scream.

Rachel quickly pulled Quinn too her as she popped out a knife and held it against Volkens neck making all the guards stop.

"Do it and I'll pull a _'Sweeney Todd'_" Rachel growled.

"Stop, stop! Don't move!" Volken commanded.

"Drop your guns!" Rachel yelled out.

The guards looked towards Volken who nodded. All the guns fell to the floor one ended up shooting one of the men on the foot.

"What kind of goons are you letting in this place V?" Rachel chuckled making Volken growl.

"Hand over the device Volken or I'll ruin this expensive suite of yours."

"In the pocket." Volken responded.

Rachel pressed the knife a little deeper reaching for the device.

"It was a pleasure doing business with you." Rachel said dropping a bomb of chloroform.

Rachel held her breath picking up Quinn and running out of the building.

"Rachel..." Quinn smiled falling in and out of consciousness. "Rachel is that you?" Quinn asked smiling sleepily. Rachel held Quinn as she had sat down in the large white van.

"I knew you were alive...I just knew it...Hey Rae...you saved me." Rachel smiled sadly wanting nothing more than to squeeze Quinn to death and breathe in her hair smell. "Rachel...I..love you too." Quinn said finally drifting out snuggling her face against Rachel. For once in a long time Rachel felt that familiar knife in her heart.

"We have to keep her here." Sarah Walker said.

* * *

"Walker's right she needs to stay here." Casey joined in.

"I know, but I just don't want her apart of this." Rachel argued.

The three stood out side the bars of the cell watching as Quinn slept.

Casey grunted and Sarah glared at him "I know you don't Rach, but when she wakes up we have to take the memory away from her, it's best."

"It will protect her." Casey chimed in.

"Protect her from what? No matter what she would be tortured to no end." Rachel snapped.

"It's best Rachel you know that." Sarah soothed her.

"FIne as soon as she-" Rachel stopped when she heard Quinn waking up, and attempting to sit up.

Rachel shared a look with Walker then opened the cell to talk to Quinn.

"Careful there." Rachel said helping Quinn sit up.

Quinn's eyes widened and wrapped her arms around the brunette. Rachel was hesitant at first then slowly wrapped her arms tightly around Quinn letting the blonde nuzzle her face in her neck.

After what seemed like hours Quinn pulled away with red eyes and a pink nose smiling at Rachel. "I knew you were alive, I never stopped looking for you." Quinn said holding Rachel's face in her hands. "Where did you go? What happened? Why did you leave me?"

Rachel held the tears and tightening in her throat back "Quinn...-" Rachel whispered breathlessly.

Suddenly there was a deep alarm sound going off. Rachel's head snapped to a flat screen showing a man muttering and breathless. Rachel quickly left Quinn and ran to the screen with Casey and Walker on either side of her.

"What is he saying?" Casey grunted.

Quinn watched as Rachel lifted her hand clicking buttons then started repeating the muttering man clip.

_"Four minutes! Four Minutes" _Quinn listened to the man saying over and over.

"It's morse code." Rachel said

"He's going to fast." Casey grunted squinting his eyes.

"Looks like he's in a hurry." Rachel said lifting her finger sliding the rewind button then slowed it down.

The man had blinked 12 times tapping his finger 20 times.

"Shit." Casey whispered. "Well come on guys you know what to do. I'll grab the important stuff and set the bomb. Walker grab the important stuff, Rachel grab the girl and make her change with you oh and get our guns for us."

The two girls nodded scurrying off to do their duties.

Rachel grabbed Quinn's hand lifting her up "Follow me."

Quinn watched as Rachel pressed her hand against the wall and with that a mechanical device came out checking Rachel's eyes, as well opening the door.

Quinn gasped their was tons of guns, and knives, and other things Quinn didn't even know existed.

Rachel pulled out two all black out fits setting them down then took out another suite.

"Here put this on first." Rachel said handing Quinn a bullet proof vest.

"Rachel-"

"Please Quinn just do it we don't have much time."

Quinn quickly pulled off her clothes, her and Rachel had snuck a peek, but they made themselves look away, yet Quinn couldn't stop looking at a few scars. Till Rachel pulled on a black shirt.

Quinn felt a little heavy with everything on, but knew to just trust Rachel.

Quinn watched as Rachel pushed a button letting all the weapons pan out. Rachel had shoved four knives on either side of her black boots making Quinn's eyes widen. Rachel then pocketed two guns a couple of grenades then looked over at Quinn handing the blonde a two masks "Put these on." it was a black ski mask and a gas mask.

When Quinn put on the gas mask she felt like she couldn't breathe.

"It's alright that feeling will past, just stay calm and breathe." Rachel said trying to calm Quinn down.

"Lets go!" Casey yelled.

Rachel picked up a rifle shot gun making sure it ad bullets in it then shut it with one hand making Quinn flinch.

"Sorry." Rachel muttered then grabbed two guns for Sarah. Rachel walked out making Sure Quinn followed.

Rachel tossed Casey his guns then handed Quinn hers.

"Thanks sweetie." Sarah smiled kissing Rachel's cheek claiming silently claiming the brunette.

Rachel blushed looking at Casey anywhere but Quinn.

Casey grunted "Lets go."

"You know I really liked this place." Rachel said taking one last look then pushed the button walking into an elevator shaft with Quinn close behind.

"Jeez Carmichael did you really have to dress her up like she's going to war?" Casey grunted.

"She's my responciblity, and I won't let anything happen to her." Rachel looked over at Quinn even though she couldn't see her she knew her eyes were on her. "I won't let anything happen to her."

"So you'll make her wear the vest but not me?" Sarah asked sarcastically.

"Wha..no Sarah..you..you don't understand she has no idea what we do, and you know the real reason why everything happened the way it did, and I don't want it to be for nothing. Besides were trained to suppress pain. Your a swift Sarah, you've never been hit. Besides your the one always pulling me out of trouble...remember?" Rachel grinned making Sarah smile back.

Casey grunted "Stop it you two make me wanna puke."

"Oh come on Johnny bear you love us!" Rachel smiled.

Casey grunted muttering how he wished he were in sec five which was a cave in Iraq.

Quinn felt her heart drop Rachel was taken; she was glad that the stupid mask hid her tears though.

"Alright lets-"

Suddenly they were ambushed.

Rachel took Quinn in her arms bending over her to keep her from getting hurt. The criminals threw a chloroform bomb knocking out the three spys leaving Quinn awake.

Quinn watched silently letting tears fall as she watched Rachel her head hanging and hands tied behind her back like she was.

* * *

Rachel groaned lifting her head then cracked her neck getting the kinks out.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked.

Quinn nodded.

Rachel took in her surroundings then saw a paper clip on the floor.

She smirked as she reached out with her leg and kicked it up catching it with her teeth.

"Don't worry, I'm gonna get us out of here Quinn."

Rachel slid the paper clip behind her back landing it in her hands.

Quinn yelled as a long haired brunette placed a knife under Rachel's neck saying "Ahahahhh...drop it."

Rachel let it go shutting her eyes closed. "Jill?"

"Huh?...I'm surprised you remembered me." Jill said rudely

Rachel chuckled shaking her head with her eyes still closed. "Ohh how could I forget you. The girl who broke my heart and tried to kill me at the same time. Not to mention a trader to the United States. You know I gave you an out to start a new life not go back to the way it was."

"You know I could just as easily kill you now."

"Do your worst." Rachel smirked. Jill pressed her face up against Rachel's neck pressuring the knife on her skin. "Remember I'm a pro."

A man walked in "Boss wants to see you."

"Okay." Jill said back leaving Rachel and Quinn.

"So tell me Carmichael. Is this your wife? Well you two really are fucking with the rules huh?" The man stalked over to Quinn.

"Touch her and I'll make you die painfully and slowly." Rachel growled.

"Ohh possessive are we?" The man pulled out a gun shoving it to Quinn's head "Tell me the coordinates! Agent Walker!"

"I don't know what your talking about!" Quinn cried out.

"Stop it! She's not Walker! Stop! It's me you want not her! Leave her alone!" Rachel yelled.

"Please your both lying!" the man said.

"No their not...that's not Walker you moron she's down the hall now go to her." Jill gritted.

"Oh" the man stifled a laugh "Well Carmichael looks like I'm going to be having some fun."

"I swear to God if you touch her I'll kill you!" Rachel screamed making the man laugh as he walked out.

"You know...I never knew why you fell for her. Why you choose her over me." Jill said sitting on Rachel's lap stroking her hair.

Rachel moved her head and snipped back "You lied to me, and tried to kill me."

Jill huffed "Please you forgave me already. Besides who is this girl?" Jill asked heading towards Quinn.

"Do you know her?"

"No." Rachel replied ignoring the pain look on Quinn's face.

"Really? Then why is she here?"

"Civilian she saw what I did and I had to take action."

"Oh well then I'll help you." Jill said cocking her gun and pointing it at Quinn's head.

"NO!" Rachel screamed.

Jill arched her eyebrow. "What? She is nobody right?"

"No she's a civilian. If you remember anything about being a good spy it's that we leave civilians out of this. It's me you want not her."

"Fine then tell me the coordinates." Jill ordered.

Rachel laughed "You honestly think I'll tell you?"

"If you don't I'll-"

"Do your worst."

Jill picked up the pliers as one of the men pulled Rachel's jaw open.

"Last chance."

"Fuck you."

Jill shut her eyes "Don't make me do this Rachel."

"Your not the Jill I remember." Rachel growled.

Jill gave one of the guys the pliers and started.

Rachel's deathly made Quinn sob and so did Sarah she had to watch her wife go through agany.

"Please! Stop!" Quinn cried out trying to reach Rachel.

"Stop she's knock out. She's had enough." Jill said quietly.

The men threw Quinn and Rachel on the ground to use their chairs before they left.

Quinn scooted to Rachel sniffling as she got the brunette's head on her lap.

An 3 minutes later Rachel had awoken "Hey." Rachel brokenly smiled then winced.

"Hey" Quinn smiled letting tears drop.

"Hey why are you crying, my angel?" Rachel asked as her eyes fluttered open and closed.

"Rachel"

"Quinn...I knew if their was a heaven you'd be the one to greet me."

Quinn's eyes watered "Rachel your... your alive. You passed out from the pain."

"I'm alive?"

Quinn nodded.

Rachel fell back unconscious waking up an hour later.

She silently sat up leaning against the wall spitting out blood.

Suddenly Quinn watched as Rachel grunted and hissed.

"Rachel no what are you doing?" Quinn whispered.

"Getting us out of here."

Quinn flinched when she heard a snap and a a sharp inhale.

"Oh god Rachel." Quinn whispered looking at her broken thumbs.

Rachel attempted to suck her thumb making it pop back in place but her mouth was in pain and couldn't do it.

"Quinn...I need you to suck my thumb...I have to pop it back in place for now."

"Okay." Quinn said quietly.

The blonde took in Rachel's thumbs gently making the brunette wince; she stopped.

"It's okay...just o it fast."

The blonde sucked on it with all she had snapping it back in place.

Rachel handed Quinn her other thumb as Quinn leaned forward resting her forehead against Rachel's. She never expected to have to do that when the girl was in pain.

"Thank you." Rachel whispered.

"No thank you."

"For what?"

"For always saving me."

Rachel heard yell and snapped her head. She reached for the knife cutting Quinn's ties.

"Make sure and stay behind me okay." Rachel whispered as Quinn nodded.

Rachel took the gun on the table sticking it behind her, and held the knife against her palm.

She observed the guards in front of the doors and swiftly cut each of their throats.

"I need you too stay right here. Okay, and take this use it if you have too." Rachel said handing Quinn a gun.

"No, I won't leave you."

"Quinn-"

"I won't Rachel please." Quinn pleaded.

"Fine, but when I say run you run and I mean if you absolutely have to...use the gun."

Quinn nodded trodding right behind Rachel.

As soon as Rachel entered she shot everyone in theri then ran to Casey and Sarah untying them.

Sarah clung to Rachel crying :I thought they...they-"

"They didn't just tried to do their worst on me." Rachel grinned and Sarah grimaced

"They hurt you."

"Of course they did."

"I'll kill them." Sarah gritted.

"I'll be fine now lets go."

Casey and Sarah took their weapons back and they all crowded he door with Quinn holding Rachel's shirt.

They watched as all the guards had surrounded the door.

Casey and Sarah both clicked their guns.

Rachel turned to Quinn "Stay close behind us."

Casey and Sarah nodded to Rachel, and with that Rachel kicked down the door.

Rachel started doing kung foo, throwing Quinn in amazement watching as the girl she loved was kicking everybody's ass.

"Jeez Rachel save some for us." Casey muttered as Rachel turned around.

She shrugged smirking "First come first serve."

Casey smirked and grunted.

Rachel stealthily ran to the the corner of another hall then leaned against the wall. She turned her head towards the tall blonde and the older man; and held up three fingers.

They nodded to her as did she. When the three guards appeared running Rachel stiffed arm them causing them all to fall down except one who she hit with her forearm. Rachel pulled out a gun shooting each of them in the ass.

"What...is that a tranq gun? You brought a tranq gun to gun fight?" Casey grunted.

Rachel just rolled her eyes, but Quinn did notice how Sarah looked at her dreamily.

"Now where to Casey?" Rachel asked.

"Me and Walker over heard a few of the guards talking about the EMP generator." Casey said.

"The EMP? I thought that was just a hoax." Rachel replied.

Sarah shrugged "Apparently it isn't. But we need it. It has to be down the hall to the left."

Rachel nodded letting Sarah take the lead.

"Wait stop!" Rachel cried out when they had gotten close to the safe.

Rachel pulled out a spray can spraying it at of no where.

It was laced with lasers waving everywhere.

"Damn it." Sarah hissed.

Casey looked to Sarah and Rachel.

Rachel sighed "Fine."

Rachel started stretching. "Man I hate these things last time it got my hair, and my favorite jacket."

"Stop whining" Casey sang out.

"Oh I'm sorry, do you wanna do this?"

"..."

"Yeah, I didn't think so." Rachel snapped.

Quinn watched with her mouth gaping as Rachel slowly made her way over the red lasers.

When Rachel got to the end she grinned at Sarah who smiled back.

Rachel hit a button shutting off the deathly lasers. They all ran to another hall, but Sarah stopped them sliding a thin canister. It sprayed some sort of mist showing a clear glass door.

Sarah and Casey both looked to Rachel.

"No! No way last time I had to do that you told me one too far and I slammed my face in!" Rachel stated.

Casey chuckled "Oh yeah! I remember that...good times."

Rachel glared at him.

"Please Rachel look I'll tell you this time it looks like a...quad droople backflip with a twist." Sarah pleaded.

Quinn gaped she knew exactly what Sarah had just said, and it was something Quinn had never seen done, but she did remember coach Slyvester getting in trouble for trying to show some cheerios how to do it.

Rachel sighed and grumbled fine.

She turned towards Quin then outstretched her arms taking a deep breath before doing back flips down the hall missing all the arrows and guns tryaing to shoot at her.

"Stop!" Sarah yelled out, and right on cue Rachel landed with a twist. She helled out her hand facing it on an invisable wall.

The glass wall went back up, and Rachel turned around smirking, but Sarah wasn't. Rachel furrowed her brows till Sarah swayed her way then bent to pick up a shining silver chain with a ring on it.

"You dropped this."

Rachel chuckled nervously. "I uhh..haaa...it must have slipped off."

"Hmhm. Why do you have it around your neck when I told you I like it better on your finger."

"Sarah you know why, plus it just brings you closer to my heart."

Sarah rolled her eyes as did Casey who grunted "Stop it you gonna make me shoot myself."

As they entered an all white room their was a machine in the middle.

"Holy shit it does exists." Rachel breathed out.

"Nerd." Casey grumbled and Rachel, Sarah, Quinn all glared at him.

"Oh really? Well it's this nerd who did everything." Rachel snapped.

Casey grunted.

"How do we...work it?" Sarah asked examining it with Rachel.

"...I'm not sure, but I remember this story my mom used to tell me all the time...it was like...umm...something about a...the blackness."

"The emp." Sarah clarified.

Rachel nodded as they kept searching.

"You mean this EMP." big older man who had a heavy Russian accent held a yellow and black rectangular box. All three spy's held up their guns this time Rachel had a real one.

"Marco." Rachel growled.

"Make a move and your dead Marco." Sarah snapped.

"No...make a move." Casey chimed in wanting to just shoot him.

When Marco looked down about to push the button Rachel took the shot shooting at his hand making him drop the emp.

"Nice aim Charmicheal." Casey smiled.

"Thanks Casey." Rachel smirked as Sarah walked over to pick up the EMP.

Suddenly their was a click of a gun "Hand it over." Jill said. "and drop the guns."

Casey and Rachel growled letting their guns drop away from them.

Jill held Sarah hostage smirking at Rachel.

"Jill don't do this...please...let me help you." Rachel pleaded.

"You can't, and you know it." Jill said shaking her head.

Rachel started slowly making her way to them holding her hands up.

"Yes I can...you just have to let Sarah go."

"You don't understand...Rachel they know who your trying to find. Every criminal you ever sent to government prison knows. Rachel you need to stop."

"I can't Jill., I can't. Look just let Sarah go and run. I'll find you." Rachel pleaded.

Jill looked hesitant then slowly let Sarah go.

"Run Jill...go." Rachel said making Casey growl.

"No...I can't I ran when you were looking for your father I can't know let me help you." Jill asked.

"No." Casey grumbled. "I didn't trust you the first time I met you and neither did Walker."

"Oh right I almost for got." Sarah said turning around punching Jill on the jaw."That was for when you tried to trick her." Sarah slammed her forearm on her face "That was for trying to kill her." Sarah swiftly kicked Jill in the face "and that was for trying to kill me."

Casey smirked "Glad I could remind you Walker."

"Go Jill...now." Rachel said.

As Jill was about to turn around ten guards and Volken walked in.

"Ahh Charmicheal we meet again."

As the guards started surrounding them Rachel pushed Quinn right behind her with Sarah.

"Sarah"

"Yeah?" she answered getting ready to fight with Rachel.

"Remember Omaha?"

Sarah smiled "Of course how could I forget."

"Yeah well this is one of those times. Omaha on three."

Sarah nodded.

"One."

"Two."

"Three!" they said in union as they all started to fight off the guards a few minutes later as they were fighting Casey called out to Rachel "The EMP!"

Volken was across the room connecting the emp.

Rachel jumped up running against the wall changing her bullets in mid air.

Rachel stopped mid air kicking Volken across the face landing with a twist.

Rachel and Sarah smiled at each other till Sarah's smile disappeared. and blood started spilling out of her stomach.

"NO!" Rachel's scream echoed across the room making Casey look back, and Quinn's eyes widen.

Rachel started fighting her way to Sarah catching Sarah before she fell.

"No...Sarah." Rachel whispered letting tears invade her eyes.

Sarah just smiled sadly back. "Please...just call me..by..my..real...na..name."

"Sam...oh god...Sam please...PLEASE...you can do this baby you can." Rachel sobbed.

Sarah Walker wait no Sam Lisa Bartowski knew she was a goner, she had always hoped she would go first. She knew it was selfish because of how much Rachel loved her and couldn't stand to be with out her, but in her heart; deep down she always knew they weren't meant to be. Rachel had her first love that she was forced to leave that. Of course their was other cons like how she would always feel alone without Rachel, and broken. The only pro was that Rachel would be alive.

"Sam...your gonna be fine baby...then when it's over well stop for good. Well do everything we were to afraid to do."

Sam smiled looking at Rachel with love to calm her. She didn't feel anymore pain. They had stabbed her four times, and yet not one string of pain.

"Rae...baby...I need you to do something we never got to." Sam whispered.

Rachel sobbed "Okay, baby anything."

Sam stroked Rachel's hair back letting her fingers graze Rachel's face "Stop this spy life once and for all. No more looking for your mother. Just let Quinn in...She's the one for you. We've always know that...Marry her...have children with her...grow old with her. Do all the things you wished you could have done with her and things we never got the chance to do."

"Sam..." Rachel cried clutching the blonde tightly.

"I love you Rachel." She smiled one last time.

"Noooooo...Sam please I love you too! I need you too!" Rachel cried in Sam's hair.

"Always remember Omaha." the blue eyed woman whispered one last time as she muttered 'I Love You' before drifting off into a glorious death.


	3. Bang

**I just wanted to say thank you to all of the reviews I got they were a great start of my day [:**

**Oh right I almost forgot no Rachel isn't an intersect, but I think I might add that in there but not what your thinking it wil be part of her past. PS listen to Bang by M.I.A. and Rye Rye when you get to the bar part, and when you hit the car scene listen to We Are Rockstars by Does It Offend, Yeah? cause I used those songs to write these ;]**

**"To Wish Impossible Things" ****Chapter Two 'Bang'**

Quinn ran through the events of of her day. She never thought in a million years she would see Rachel again in a bank! Let alone the girl be international government ops secret agent!

It broke Quinn's heart to no end seeing Rachel and Sam in love, but when Rachel had to watch the women she loves die. It broke Quinn even more, all she wanted to do was hold Rachel to rock her back and forth whispering soothing words in her ear, but that didn't happen at all.

"NO!" Rachel screamed as men plied her away from Sam. "No don't touch her!" Rachel yelled watching as the men tried to take Sam with them, but Casey ran over too Rachel and brought Rachel in a hug as the men in all black suites lifted pulled a black sheet over her.

"No! Please! General! General do something!" Rachel cried out to an older women with her hair up in a bun. "Please!"

The women nodded to Casey who said "It's okay Rachel, she's gone."

"Nooo" Rachel cried as he pulled her to his chest letting her cry. It made him remember his daughter and how he never wanted her to go through something like this. He made a mental note to call her.

"Take agent Carmichael home." The women said to Casey. "Carmichael"

Rachel looked up.

"When your done mourning I would like to have a word with you, but for now go home and grieve. You and Agent Walker were my top agents, and I would like to give my condolences to you...but please stay with Miss Fabray make sure no one comes after her."

Quinn didn't understand why every spy seemed like a souless robotic automaton.

After the General nodded she and her crew packed up.

"Agent Carmichael, I'm sorry for your loss." A man said taking hi helmet off.

Rachel nodded and it was the next person who was a young women "Agent Carmichael, you and agent Walker are...were the reasons I'm training to be a field agent. May she rest in peace."

Rachel nodded to each young black ops agent as they left offering condolences.

Rachel stood in silence as the room emptied; leaving Casey and Quinn behind.

They all got into an SUV; Rachel was staring out the window wearing a blank expression.

"Miss Fabray, where do you live?"

Quinn's head snapped up to Casey.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

When they got to Quinn's place Casey walked in with them checking the place for Rachel who they couldn't read.

When Casey came back he stopped in front of Rachel.

"It's okay Casey...duty calls, right?" Rachel said in a monotone voice.

"I'm gonna go back to Burbank, and talk to my daughter. I'll wait there for you." Casey said quietly.

"...Are you going to tell Ellie?" Rachel asked.

"Do you want me too?" Casey asked.

Rachel nodded her head slowly .

Casey nodded then made his way to the door only to stop when Rachel called out to him.

"...Please don't tell her that I'm still a spy. Just tell her I'm sorting things out."

Casey nodded then left.

Quinn watched Rachel for several moments till she noticed that Rachel still had blood on her. Sarah's blood. So she left grabbing sweats and a t shirt; then stopped to grab a wet rag.

"Come here Rachel." Quinn voiced softly.

Rachel slowly turned around letting Quinn lead her to the kitchen table. The blonde gently cleaned Rachel, wiping off blood, and tear stains.

"Heres some clothes." Quinn said quietly.

Rachel nodded slowly "Thank you."

"Do you...do you want to stay with me in my bed?" Quinn asked.

Rachel shook her head "I better sleep on the couch. If that's okay."

"Of course." Quinn said breathlessly.

Before Quinn left to her room she ran back to Rachel catching the brunette off guard embracing her in a hug, and kiss on the cheek "I love you." she whispered before she ran back to her room.

When Quinn left Rachel pulled out her phone. Quinn heard her talking from the bathroom.

"Hey Marco, I would like to have a meeting with Volken. Tomorrow at three at the _Bali_bar." Rachel demanded then shut her phone. She knew exactly who killed Sarah, and she will have her vengeance.

Quinn plotted on following Rachel she wasn't gonna lose her twice.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Quinn watched as Rachel slept while she made coffee.

When the coffee started to brew, Quinn walked over to Rachel about to stroke her hair softly when Rachel grabbed her arm throwing her underneath her pressing a knife beneath her neck.

When Rachel realized who it was she quickly backed off dropping the knife to the floor.

"I..I..I'm sorry...I thought you were-"

"It's okay.." Quinn chuckled "I understand; never touch a spy while their sleeping."

Rachel looked down ashamed.

"Would you like some coffee?" Quinn asked.

"No thank you." Rachel said softly.

Rachel noticed Quinn had washed her clothes. "Thank you, for...washing those."

"Your welcome." Quinn smiled softly.

"...Quinn...I know your just yearning to know every question in that head of yours, but can they wait? I have to make a call to Sam's dad..., and you know set up...arrangements."

Quinn nodded slightly "I waited six years whats another day?" she chuckled sadly.

Rachel flinched grimacing "I'm sorry Quinn."

Quinn took a deep breath "I'm gonna go change." The blonde left to grab some coffee then went to her room.

By the time Quinn walked into the living room Rachel was gone. Quinn quickly grabbed her keys but stopped when she saw a note _'Stop, don't go anywhere it still might not be safe for you. Just stay here till I come back.'_

Quinn huffed, but then she remembered Rachel said she was going to _'The Bali bar'_at 3 o'clock, the blonde would just see her there.

Quinn searched for directions then left at two; she waited at the coffee shop across the street till she saw Rachel walk in.

Quinn quickly paid then ran across the street.

"I'm sorry mam but this is a private bar." A big man said.

"But my...my wife just went in there." Quinn said the first thing she could think of.

The man furrowed his brows. "Carmichael...is...with you? Well aren't you scrawny, I could have sworn you were a little taller, and more strong, and had blue eyes; but I guess photos don't really come out right."

Quinn nodded eagerly. The man shurrged then let Quinn in. She crouched below a wall where Rachel was just on the other side.

"So Carmichael, your a trader now I hear?" Volken asked.

"Their's no reason for me to be a spy for America now anymore."

Quinn furrowed her brows _'What?' she thought to herself._

"Well then I must say-"

"Well hello Ms Carmichael how do you do? Where is your wife? I thought I let her in?" The large man asked sweetly.

"Wife?" Volken repeated.

"It's a set up!" Mia and Marco yelled making all the guards pull their guns out.

_'Shit, that's why she wanted me to stay.' Quinn mentally kicked herself._

"Oh there she is." the large man grinned lifting Quinn up with one hand.

"I thought I told you to stay at home." Rachel grumbled.

"I'm sorry?" Quinn smiled weakly.

"Damn it Quinn you can't keep doing things like this! It's too dangerous!" Rachel yelled.

Volken rolled his eyes along with Marco, and Mia. The large man nodded his head in agreement "She's right you know."

"Sorry Lenny." Rachel said as the large man turned his head to her and Rachel sucker punched him.

The tiny brunette held her hand against her chest "Shit that hurt!"

"Shoot her!" Volken screamed.

Rachel took Quinn's hand and helped her over the bar as she hopped over in one fluid motion.

Quinn held her ears at the loud sharp sounds of guns blaring all around them.

"Hey Carmichael!" Mia screamed out.

As Rachel kept shooting out.

The brunette turned back gathering bullets.

"I was the one who stabbed Walker!" she yelled out.

Rachel growled shoving the ammo in with her sides and jumped up shooting out.

Rachel grumbled sitting down by Quinn. She kept hitting everyone else but that bitch Mia.

Quinn noticed how dangerously close the bullets were getting to Rachel so as Rachel reloaded Quinn pulled her to the side to her so she wouldn't get shot.

"Thank you." Rachel smirked then jumped over the bar to get a closer shot.

Rachel flew by every bullet that came her way just to get to one person. Mia.

Rachel threw her guns at two guards then pulled out a knife. Quinn thought about how Puck would have loved to see this. She could just imagine what he would say well what he and Santana would say _'Holy shit Berry's going 3oo on their asses!'_

Rachel shoved the knife in her boot grabbing one of the guards to shield her as she passed a spot where they could get her.

She dumped the guard down grabbing two tommy gun's one of them had.

Rachel chuckled as she blared them out at all the guards on the railings.

"Quinn you can come out now!" Rachel called out

Quinn poked her head out looking side to side then rushed to Rachel's side.

"Come on I saw Mia run this way." Rachel said.

The brunette led them to this dark hall running till she stopped them.

She opened the door smirking; it was a garage.

"Come on" Rachel said running down the rows of cars till she came across a slick black Lamborghini.

She quickly turned it on as Quinn got in. Rachel floored it making them go super fast.

"Look Quinn when I say lean down then that means to tilt your seat back, and when I say take the wheel you take the wheel. Got it?" Rachel said.

Quinn nodded furiously.

"Good, now hold on tight."

The spy honked her horn as she went down alley ways.

"How are you going to find them?"

"Volken has GPS's on all of his cars." Rachel clarified pointing to the GPS showing three other speeding cars that Rachel was trailing.

Rachel skidded past Mia and the others. "Damn it!"

Rachel watched as the three cars curved into the freeway, and she stayed behind on top of a bridge.

_'Please make a legal u-turn, you have missed your mark.'_the woman on the GPS said. _'Please make a-'_

"Shut up!" Rachel yelled.

_'Recalulating'_

Rachel growled.

_'Recal..recalculating.'_

"Sorry car." Rachel muttered as she floored it.

"Rach..Rachel.." Quinn warned.

"Hold on Quinn." Rachel.

"Rachel!" Quinn yelled as Rachel flew the car up a ramp.

"Yeah!" Rachel cheered as they landed in front of Marcos car.

"Oh my gosh!" Quinn breathed out gripping the handle of the door and the glove box.

Rachel laughed looking over at Quinn.

Quinn yelped as a bullet hit the window.

"Bitch!" Rachel huffed.

Take the wheel Quinn." and before Quinn could even react Rachel lifted her self and pulled the top down shooting at Marco who ended up crashing.

Rachel smiled at Quinn as she reclaimed the wheel. "One down...two more too go."

Rachel sped up to Volken playing chicken with another car in front of her.

Rachel floored it making the car flip in the air over Volken "Fuck you!" Rachel yelled as she shot a bulled in his head as the car hovered right over Volken then landed.

Mia and Rachel kept hitting eachother with their cars till Rachel broke Mia's window and yelled for Quinn to tilt the seat back.

Mia hit her nos flying past Rachel who grumbled and handed her gun to Quinn who held it funny.

"Jebus Quinn put in the glove compartment." Rachel flinched.

"Oh...um okay." Quinn said slapping the glove box closed.

"Hold on tight Quinn." Rachel said pushing her nos buttons.

"Rachel look she must have crashed; her car isn't moving!" Quinn shouted pointing at the GPS.

Rachel looked and nodded.

Quinn was right Mia had crashed. She was laying against the wall clutching her stomach.

Rachel grumbled "Stay here" as she grabbed her glove from the glove box.

"Rachel...what...what are you going to do to her?" Quinn asked.

"Just keep your eyes closed till I say to open them Quinn." Rachel said making Quinn cover her eyes with her hands.

The next thing Quinn heard was the car door shut and she cracked open her eyes as she watched Rachel walk up to Mia.

"Did you kill her?" Rachel asked crouching down to make eye contact with Mia.

The evil brunette smirked with blood pouring from her mouth. "I did numerous times as soon as her attention was on you I took my chance."

"You sick bitch." Rachel gritted smacking Mia in the face. Rachel stood up backing away from Mia and pointed her gun.

"Please have mercy Carmichael" Mia pleaded.

"Did you give Sarah mercy? Did you!" Rachel screamed.

Mia straightened her posture then said "Do it."

Quinn flinched at the shot that had seemed to echo to her. She watched as Rachel walked back to the car and silently got in.

Rachel pulled out her phone "This is agent Carmichael code number 611124. I need a corner on 6th and 7th." She shut her phone and drove them in silence.

The spy pulled them in to another dark garage; each light over head slowly flickering on.

Rachel parked the car then told Quinn "Get in the car beside you. I'll be there shortly."

Quinn nodded as Rachel walked towards a women who she was pretty sure it was Jill.

The spies where nodding till Jill handed her key's.

"I'm sorry about Sarah." Jill whispered.

Rachel only nodded.

Jill leaned over and kissed Rachel's cheek making the fire in Quinn's stomach light up.

"Thank you Jill." Rachel said then walked back towards a Porsche.

"Where do you want me to take you?" Rachel asked quietly.

"With you." Quinn said back.

Rachel slightly nodded the put the car in drive.

Quinn watched as Rachel drove them silently through the streets of New York City.

The spy slipped them into a dark tunnel driving them into another garage.

Quinn looked at all the cars around them they must be Rachel's Quinn thought. Quinn followed the brunette into a elevator.

When they entered Rachel's place it had windows around it over looking the other buildings. It was modern and slick.

Rachel led Quinn to the guest room but Quinn had stopped.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked her.

"You...you have kids?"

Rachel chuckled smiling adoringly at the picture of her and the small blonde haired little boy inside the kids room. "No...Sarah...she um..no, no we didn't have kids. That is my nephew Jamie."

"You have a nephew? Wait...look Rachel...I have no idea..I-" Quinn started stuttering not knowing how to tell Rachel she wants to know what the hell is going on.

"Come on lets get you settled in then well...get to your questions." Rachel said showing Quinn to her room.

Rachel came back two minutes later with a pair of shorts and shirt.

"Um...these are Sa...were, they were Sam's so you guys should be about the same size" Rachel said handing Quinn the clothes.

"No...Rachel..no I can't." Quinn said backing away from the clothes knowing it would be too sad and weird to do that.

"'s okay..she hardly ever wore shorts, so your good. Look I'll just set them here and I'll just go take a shower."

Quinn stared at the clothes for a while till she finally caved and slowly put them on. She listened as the water had been on and knew Rachel would be hungry cause she was and walked to the kitchen.

She spotted bacon and pancakes _'Maybe that will make Rachel brighten up a bit.'_

Rachel walked towards the smell and stood in shock at how Quinn was cooking. She looked just like Sarah when she cooked. She stood staring with her mouth open as Quinn turned around smiling.

Rachel shook her head then smiled at Quinn "Hey, I see you figured out how to work the stove."

"Yeah...I hope this is okay" Quinn said biting her lip thinking maybe she had made her self too much at home.

"No really it's cool. I am hungry." Rachel smiled.

Quinn smiled and served the both of them.

"Wow that was really good Quinn, thank you." Rachel smiled pushing up her plate.

"Your welcome."

They sat in silence both just sizing each other up

"So...how have you been since high school?" Rachel asked

Quinn looked back up "Well I've been worried sick. Everyday I spend my time looking for you."

Rachel looked down away from her hazel eyes.

"Rachel why did you do that? How could you kiss me then tell me to remember that you love me then runaway? How could you and your dad's move away and you not tell me?"

"Quinn do you honestly think I wanted to leave you? Cause I didn't; I never wanted to leave you." Rachel said back.

"Why did you?" Quinn asked.

"Quinn I..I'm a spy...I work for the CIA, the NSA, and black ops. I have been since I turned fifteen. The Berry men they were together. They were partners and I was assigned to them."

"So...this whole time everything I know about you...is..is a lie. Your not the Rachel Berry I know the one I fell in love with."

That hurt Rachel but sh knew she deserved that. "Quinn...think about it...and I mean really think about it. How did I act around other people?"

"Like... Rachel Berry."

"Okay now how did I act when I was with you?" Rachel asked hopefully.

Quinn was stunned for a moment "UnRachel Berry like; you really listened to me, and made me laugh. You were always there for me."

"See...I acted like my true self Quinn you brought _me_ out. That's why they sent me far away from you cause I wanted to quit and be with you. I wanted to have a normal life, and they didn't like that."

"So...you were really yourself with me but put on an act with others?" Quinn asked.

"Yes."

"Where did you go after you left me?"

"They sent me to some secret spy school in Prague training me then sent me on my frist mission with Sam it was in Ohmaha."

"Oh...did you even miss me? Or think about me?" Quinn asked.

"Everyday."

"Did...you ever...look for me?" Quinn asked.

"No."

Quinn wanted to cry.

"I didn't because I...was scared."

Quinn looked up.

"I was scared of feeling something that I was trained to ignore. Pain...Everything ran through my mind like what if she died, what if she moved on what if she moved on with some asswhole? What if she's married and has kids? What if she hates me? But the main thing that kept me away was that I knew if I saw you again I wouldn't have the strength to to leave you again." Rachel's thumb found Quinn's cheek wiping away a stray tear.

Quinn leaned into Rachel's hand making her cup her face. Quinn's tears started running fast down her face and she let out a sob crying out "I never forgot about you, not even if I tried. I never stopped looking for you. I never gave up hope. I never stopped loving you!"

Rachel pulled her into a hug stroking her hair and rubbing circle's on her back. Rachel kissed the top of Quinn's head "I'm sorry I hurt you so much. I thought it would be for the best, that I was protecting you, that you didn't need me the way I needed you. That we could never be because of who I am, and who I will always be. I'm a spy's daughter that ended up being just like her dad and mom something Ellie never wanted me to be. Something that Sam hatted. Once Sam put a distance between us because she thought I killed a man. It was my first solo mission and I was told to kill the man in the picture, but I couldn't do it. I wouldn't do it. And so Casey did it for me. Because if I didn't then I was out of the spy game and that meant no Sam."

"You did it to protect me?"

"Of course, why do you think I made you put on all that gear? I wanted no one to know who you are and how much you mean to me."

"But you loved Sam too?"

A phone interrupted them.

_'Chuck?' a worried voce called out. 'Chuck are you okay?' she cried._

"Yeah...El...I'm doing better."

_'Chuck when are you coming home?' Ellie asked._

"I'm just tying some things up here Ellie that's all. I call you when I know." Rachel said trying to keep her voice even.

_'I love you Chuck please just come home and you can stay with me or your old place okay.'_

"Alright El..I love you too." Rachel shut her phone clutching it tightly in her hands.

"Are okay?" Quinn asked touching Rachel's fist.

"Yeah...it just...yeah I'll be fine." Rachel said clearing her throat.

A throat cleared and Rachel turned around "General."

The woman nodded; she was on the glass veering back at Rachel.

_'Agent Carmichael we have set up the funeral in Burbank. It's in three days. I will debrief you there. That is all.'_

"Why do people keep calling you Carmicheal?" Quinn asked.

"That's my cover last name and the first is Rachel."

"Oh."

"Quinn?"

"Yes?"

"Will you...will you go with me to the funeral?"

"Of course I will." she answered back.

Rachel and Quinn sat down on her bed getting comfortable "Okay go." Rachel sighed.

"Tell me everything" Quinn stated.

"Well my father Steve he and my mother Mary were both spy's. My mom left us when we were very young I think I was in the third grade then my dad was never really there till one day he left us all together. When 8th grade ended I was approached by this man and women telling me how I could make a difference in this world and I took it. That's how I ended up in Lima. They gave me small missions here and there, till I graduated."

"And you wanted out?"

"Yeah, I mean I felt so alone, but when I was with you I felt like myself again."

"Really?" Quinn asked.

"Really, really."

"You said_ us_? who is _us_?" Quinn asked a minute later.

"Me and my older sister Ellie...here hold on." Rachel said grabbing a photo from her draw and handed it to her. "That's me and Ellie when she took me to the zoo on my birthday." Rachel smiled.

Quinn smiled lightly looking at an eight year old Rachel and her sister.

"Does she know?" Quinn asked.

"Well when Ellie finished high school I was going into high school so the government told my sister I was chosen to attend a private school in Switzerland. It was really hard for her to let me go. Then when me and Sam moved in together she found out. It's a long story but really her husband Devon had found out I was a spy first then she did."

"Wow..."

"Yeah then I found my dad and then more drama when I had became an intersect which is another long story, but then finally after all the drama I had lost my dad again. He was shot in the chest and died in my arms. That's how Ellie found out what I do."

"Ellie hatted it and so did my dad. He never wanted me in this and Ellie hatted that I had kept it from her for so long, and how I let myself be in danger. So I tried to stop. Me and Sam stopped for a few months just traveling in Europe by train till we got bored and ended up taking a mission. After that I kept going and looking for my mom, but I can't find her. It feels like I get so close then get pushed a million steps back."

"Does Ellie know your still a spy?"

"No she doesn't but she knows Sam is..was."

"Wow..." Quinn breathed out laying down. The thought of Rachel Berry really being a spy was insane.

"Enough about me I wanna know about you Quinn...please?" Rachel asked.

"Well...I graduated from NYU with Santana, and Brittney did too. Santana works as a lawyer, and Brittney teaches dance."

"What about you?" Rachel asked.

"I'm a book publisher; well not exactly" Quinn said making Rachel raise her eyebrow. Quinn felt so embarrassed she knew Rachel had big dreams and yet still her job is probably the best yet worst job in the world.

"Well then what do you do?"

"Well my boss gives me...um well my boss...she-"

"Quinn are you telling me your boss gives you all the work; or that she just makes you run errands?"

Quinn looked down embarrassed.

"Where do you work?" Rachel asked.

"Simon and Shuester." Quinn replied "I actually have to go in tomorrow."

Quinn looked around Rachel's room noticing how everything looked untouched like Rachel wanted to keep Sam's stuff exactly the way it was...before. She saw a picture on Sam's purse. It was Sam and Rachel. Rachel's arms were around Sam's neck behind her. They looked so perfect and happy. Rachel noticed, and Quinn looked down.

"She never let that picture out of her sight. She always had copies with her. It was her favorite." Rachel said remembering the good times with her wife.

"When did you marry her?" Quinn asked seeing the silver chain around her neck.

Rachel touched the chain feeling the cold steel against her skin. "About a couple years ago in Burbank."

"Did you call her family?" Quinn asked.

"I called her dad. But she never talked about who else was in her family."

"She never talked to you about her family?"

"As spys we don't open ourselves up very well. Were like fort knox, especially Sam. I never knew her real name till about three years into our relationship. She told me she'd tell me anything I wanted to know in our first year, but I said no that it doesn't matter anymore. Cause I knew how she spent her childhood; how she became a spy but I always knew her mom was a bad subject just like mine."

"You don't know why your mom left?"

"...I used to think it was my fault. That I was too difficult or that I messed up some how. But when Sam found out I was secretly looking for her she started helping me. She found this paper saying she was missing."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be"

"Do you wish you could find her?"

"Yes. I wish I could tell her everything she missed. An amazing son in law who gave Ellie the most beautiful sweet baby boy in the world. That Ellie has the perfect family. That she was the one there for me every day, that she became a successful doctor."

"What about you?"

Rachel snorted "What that I was the stupid one? Following in the foot steps of her and my dad? That was probably the stupidest thing I ever did. I wasn't normal. I grew up too fast."

"It wasn't the stupidest thing...you met me...and Sam. You traveled the world making a difference. Stopping the bad."

"Your right meeting you and Sam was the best thing that ever happened to me. Even if you did treat me bad in the beginning." Rachel smirked.

Quinn gasped "I can not believe your bringing that up!"

Rachel shrugged.

"If you could have stopped all the bullying why didn't you?"

"Because...it made me feel human. That's why I dressed that way and acted that way."

"I'm sorry you had such a hard life." Quinn said shaking her head.

"It's life. It would be wrong if you didn't have bad in it. Like you, you had a hard time during sophomore year."

Quinn looked down nodding then snapped her head up "Beth! Shelby! She isn't your mom! Oh God I gave Beth to a spy didn't I?"

Rachel looked down nodding "She stopped though. All she wanted was family...Have you heard from Beth?"

Quinn looked down shaking her head no "I don't want to until she's ready. I mean how am I suppose to tell her Puck died of AIDS that her bio dad got me drunk when we had her? What if she hates me for giving her up?"

"She can't...Well maybe she will at first, but when she turns the age you had her she'll understand why you gave her up."

"But I was selfish for giving her up." Quinn said scowling at herself.

"Quinn no you weren't."

"Yes, I was."

"How?"

"I didn't want Puck's spawn...I didn't want to be a mother at sixteen."

"No Quinn that maybe a part of it but we both know you gave her up because you couldn't give her what she needs."

"How do yo do that? Read me?"

"I didn't read you Quinn. I know cause you told me when you got drunk on her birthday."

"Oh yeah...I always wondered how you weren't trashed like me."

"I have a high tolerance of alcohol, and pain." Rachel nodded.

"...When did you relize you...had feelings for me?" Quinn asked breaking the silence.

Rachel furrowed her brows. "Wow...I don't know...I think it was when you had gotten in that fight with Santana during Junior year. You were crying in the stall and I knew how much that hurt you and I wondered to myself why I felt hurt as well and so instead of you screaming at me you cried in my neck asking for forgiveness. Asking me if Beth will hate you...What about you?" Rachel asked.

"I think it was when you had told me to come back to glee and I snapped at you telling you I would have tormented you if the roles were reversed and all you said was _'I know.' _That's when it hit me. That the reason I always wanted to torment you was because I was secretly in love with you."

"Wow." Rachel smiled "Quinn Fabray had a thing for Rachel Berry back in highschool."

Quinn giggled saying "Shut up"

"...So how did Puck get AIDS?"

Quinn looked down shaking her head "He had sex with a girl who didn't know she had it as well."

"Did you guys stay close?" Rachel asked.

"Kinda sorta not really. When everyone left he stayed behind. How did you find out?"

"Shelby told me."

"You keep in touch with her?"

"No...she wrote me a letter telling me what had happened. Don't ask me how she found me...she just did. It felt so weird thinking of Noah dying, and when I went to visit him he was so...weak, yet strong. It astounded me really."

"You...visited him?"

"Yeah..."

"Why didn't he tell me! He knew I was searching high and low for you!"

"Because I told him not too. When I first saw him he was so happy to see me, and he asked _'Why did you leave Quinn? She loves you I thought you were dead.'_ He said it better be a damn good reason. So..I told him, everything."

"What did he say?"

Rachel chuckled "He was speechless, and thought I was kidding till I told him stories. After that that's all he wanted was story's from my travels. I had gotten a call away in south America near the Amazon when I was with him, and I had found out their was a serum there, and that maybe I could help. So I told him, and he said no that he didn't want his hopes up, and for me just to bring him back a great story. I told him no that I would stay, and he said that he wanted me to go he hated being shown as weak. I laughed and told him he couldn't be more wrong. So I stayed and a week later he passed."

"What did Sam say?"

"She just let me be, and did the assignment with Casey."

"Why couldn't you stay at least for the funeral?"

"Because I didn't want people asking questions about me when they should be grieveing for Noah."

Quinn nodded.

"Lets get some sleep. You have work in the morning right?" Rachel said looking at her clock.

"Yeah I do." Quinn said slowly she really just wanted Rachel to open up more, but she knew it would take time.

"Can... I stay here with you?" Quinn asked.

"...okay." Rachel said back she kind of just wanted sometime to cry and smell Sam's pillow.

Rachel rolled to Sam's side and clutched the pillow to her face inhaling the scent.

Quinn silently watched Rachel let tears soak up Sam's pillow. She reached out for Rachel's hand squeezing it tight till she felt Rachel's hand slowly release. Knowing she was asleep.

"Sam...Sam...SAM!" Rachel cried out sitting up.

Quinn sat up with her watching as Rachel's eyes filled with tears then closed grimacing at the fact that Sam was in fact gone.

Rachel slowly got out of bed going into the bathroom silently washed her face, and crawled back in bed. Quinn took her hand once again till she fell back to sleep.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

When Quinn woke up Rachel was gone but she found a note _'Here's some clothes I bought you for work.'_

Quinn smiled taking the clothes and making sure they weren't Sams'.

When the blonde walked into work her boss was packing up her desk.

"Ah Ms Fabray they want you upstairs." an older man said pointing up.

Quinn's eyes widened the bosses worked up stairs. Quinn slipped into the elevator as all the faces on her floor stared at her in shock.

"Ms Fabray their waiting for you." the secretary smiled.

Quinn nodded then slowly walked in seeing the CEO of the company and a women staring out at the view.

"Ah Ms Fabray! I would like you to meet the new chairwomen of this company Ms Berry."

Quinn stood wide mouthed as Rachel slowly turned around smiling.

"Ms Fabray she wants you to take over Ms Rodels job."

"Wow...thank you." Quinn breathed out.

"Yes well...Ms Rodel wasn't doing her job; you were. So congrats on your new raise, job, and office."

"Very well the Quinn well go get started." the CEO smiled.

Quinn nodded as she slowly left wanting nothing more than to jump with glee.

When Quinn left work she saw Rachel leaning against the side of the building smiling. Quinn instantly took her in for a hug. "Thank you so much Rachel!"

Rachel chuckled "Your welcome."

"How did you do it?"

"It's me." Rachel shrugged making Quinn giggle.

They started walking down the sidewalk.

Quinn glanced at Rachel "Hey..." Rachel looked over at Quinn.

"Are you ready for the funeral?"

"Yes...and no. It's so...weird she was so strong. Invincible. I mean...we both you the consequence of being together but...I always I thought it would be me in my early grave. Not her."

Quinn stayed silent watching Rachel's face in the corner of her eye. She has been waiting for Rachel to break down but it hasn't happened. To be frank Quinn really doesn't remember ever seeing her cry before, and yeah sure Rachel cried with Sam in her arms, but as soon as she realized it she stopped completely.

"So when do we leave?" Quinn asked.

"As soon as your bags are all packed up."

As soon as Quinn was finished packing a car picked them up, and drove them to a private air field.

"Hello agent Carmichael." the stewardess smiled leading them into the jet plane.

When Rachel sat down she started chuckling.

"What?" Quinn asked smiling.

_'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane, I don't know when I'll be back again'_

Quinn laughed "I hated when Mr Shue always wanted us to do old songs."

_"Aw come on guys it's a classic"_Rachel mimicked.

Quinn giggled again "I miss it so much. Everything always seemed so rough, when really we had it easy."

"We never had it easy Quinn, but your right I do miss glee club. All they're cruelness to me made me feel pain." Rachel said seriously.

"I always hatted them for that." Quinn let out.

"It was only for a little while till you were by me and they saw a glimpse of the real me."

"Have you sang since then?" Quinn asked.

"...No." Rachel answered. "You?"

"No...it hurts without you." Quinn blushed when Rachel looked at her.

"You know I never listened to music after high school, but I only missed one voice...yours." Rachel says back making Quinn grow with lust.

"Really?"

"Yeah...I missed it...I missed you." Rachel clarified.

"I missed you too." Quinn breathed out inching forward slowly.

Rachel turned her cheek to Quinn's lips. "My wife isn't even in the grave yet." Rachel growled.

"I-I'm sorry...I'm sorry." Quinn replied feeling her heart break. "Excuse me." she uttered.

Rachel sighed grabbing Quinn's hand before she turned. "Quinn...I'm sorry."

Quinn nodded smiling sadly then turned to the bathroom that she silently cried in till she heard the buzzer for her to sit and buckle up.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Agent Carmichael." a young man greeted them. "Would you like me to drive you or would you like to take Audi?"

"Audi, and put your name tag away. Names don't matter in this business." Rachel said taking the keys and getting in the car as Quinn did.

"Thank you...for the advice agent Carmicheal, I greatly appreciate it." The young man quickly put the name tag in his jacket pocket and nervously reached out for Rachel's hand.

Right before Rachel shifted the gear into drive the man called out "Wait!" Rachel kept her foot on the break. Looking at the nervous boy. "Is it true you,agent Walker, and cornel Casey were the ones who set off the nuclear bombs on your first year together by playing a video game?"

Rachel nodded looking at the steering wheel. The boy grinned "Wow." he said "That is amazing."

"Todd is it?" Rachel asked the young man.

He nodded eagerly "How did you know?"

"I was the one who told you to put it away remember? Look Todd you don't look older than 20, and you can't think straight under pressure...Is this what you really want? To live life in secrets, silence; or was to get praised? Because belive me you won't. Do me a favour Todd and go home to your parents and rethink what you want to do with your life. Because once your in it you don't come out." With that Rachel sped away from the confused boy, and silently sped through traffic.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx **

When Rachel parked the car she sat still then turned towards Quinn.

"Remember my sister doesn't know what I do. She thinks I'm in a Symphony in New York."

"What do I say I do?" Quinn asked.

"Just tell her the truth about yourself."

"What if she asks if I knew Sam?"

"Tell her the truth. That you didn't really know her, but remember no one knows that Sarah is Sam. They think her name is Sarah Walker." Rachel clarified.

Quinn nodded as they both got out.

Rachel took out their bags holding each of them in hand Quinn right by her side. Rachel looked to her side watching Casey look through his blinds of his apartment. Rachel took out her key and opened the door. She stopped Quinn abruptly hearing the static of the TV.

She dropped their bags taking out her gun and slowly crept through her old apartment. As she examined her apartment she noticed how everything was trashed and out of place. She sniffed the air smelling sweat, and moldy cheese.

Quinn was right beside her looking around as well.

A pair of arms wrapped around Rachel's waist and neck.

Rachel lifted the intruder up then smacked him down on the hard wood floor pointing the gun at..

"Morgan?" Rachel asked.

"Hi, Chuck." Morgan squeaked out.

"Wha-what are you doing here?" Rachel asked watching a breathless Morgan lay completely still.

"Um- Ouch- Well your sister told me what happened, and of course I came as soon as I heard. I'm so sorry Chuck." Morgan said taking Rachel in a hug.

"Morgan, you live in Burbank. What happened to the place you and Alex had?" Rachel asked not even hugging Morgan back.

He noticed taking a step back he knew Rachel wasn't ready to bear her soul yet. "...Alex is mad at me again. She wants me to not be friends with Anna."

"Anna? Buddy why would you want to keep contact with her? She left you for someone else."

Morgan shrugged "I let her have your old job, and now Alex thinks I want her still."

Rachel shook her head taking in her surroundings. "What did you do?"

"Well I went on a monster bender, and cried a lot then I figured I'd help you out." Morgan said sheepishly.

"Help me out? Help me out with what Morgan?" Rachel asked.

"Well...I remember how when you, and Sarah were when you had stupidly choose being a-" Morgan looked over at Quinn then back at Rachel. "When you choose your career over her."

"Morgan-"

"Chuck, look I know how you hide your emotions. Just like the day your mom left and all we did was play video games and talk about video games. You can hide it all you want Chuck but I know you. I've know you since pre-K, It hurts you when your reminded of them. So I took all of her things out."

Rachel shut her eyes tightly keeping her emotions at bay. Damn Morgan for knowing her so damn well.

I'm Morgan by the way, Morgan Grimes." he smiled shaking Quinn's hand.

"Quinn, Quinn Fabray." Quinn replied.

Morgans eyes went wide then turned to Rachel. "Chuck? Does she...know?"

Rachel looked at Quinn then back to Morgan and slightly nodded.

"When?" Morgan dug.

"The day Sarah died."

Morgan was silent blinking back tears "I'll clean up here. Go see your sister she misses you like crazy, and I mean _crazy."_

When Rachel shut the door Quinn asked her "Your friend, Morgan. Did he already know about me?"

"Yes, I tell him everything." Rachel replied then knocked on her sister's door.

"CHUCK!" a tall well built dirty blonde man opened the door in khaki pants and a light blue polo; taking Rachel up in a tight bear hug. "Ahhh Chuck we all missed you so much."

Rachel heard a glass shatter. She looked up to see her sister in shock with her emerald eyes watery and nose growing pink.

"Chuck!" she sobbed pulling her little sister to her tightly. "Ohhhh God thank you for taking care of my little sister." Ellie prayed Ellie bent back a little "How are you feeling sweetie?"

Rachel let a couple of tears fall then pulled her big sister back in a hug "God I missed you Ellie."

"Aunt Rachel!" a small blonde boy beamed from the top of the stairs then ran down jumping into Rachel's arms.

Rachel squeezed tightly breathing in her nephew "Ohh Jimmie jam. I missed you so much buddy."

"I missed you too!" The small boy looked around "Where's Aunt Sarah?"

Rachel looked up at her big sister. Who mouthed '_I'm sorry.'_

"...Jamie, your aunt Sarah isn't coming back." Rachel said slowly putting, Jamie down.

"What do you mean? Did you guys get a divorce like my friend Justin did?" Jamie asked.

"No buddy, no we didn't. Your aunt was in an accident a few days ago." Rachel said back feeling her heart ache.

"Is she okay?" Jamie asked.

Rachel sighed "...She is now buddy. She's up their with your grandpa now."

Jamie looked down and sniffled "I'm sorry."

"It's okay buddy." Rachel said back as Jamie ran up stairs.

"I am soo sorry Chuck. We just didn't know-"

"Ellie it's okay...this is my friend Quinn. Quinn this is my sister Ellie and her husband Devon."

"Hi, Quinn." Ellie greeted as Devon grinned and said hi.

Rachel felt a tug on her shirt. "Yeah buddy?" she looked down at Jamie.

Rachel bent down as Jamie waited for his parents and Quinn to leave the room "Uncle Morgan ttold me your secret."

Rachel's eyes widened.

"Don't worry I won't tell. I just thought you should know your the best secret super hero in the world aunt Rachel." Jamie said enveloping Rachel in a tiny bear hug.

"Thank you Jimmie Jam."

Jamie smiled then went back upstairs as Rachel went in the living room sitting next to Quinn.

"So Quinn you were friends with Sarah as well?" Ellie asked wondering if this hazel eyed blonde was a spy as well.

"No...I only met her once, but I didn't want Rachel going by her self." Quinn said.

"Oh, well thank you for being with my little sister through this." Ellie said softly.

"It's no problem. Really." Quinn said squeezing Rachel's hand.

Ellie raised her brow but Devon intervened "So Quinn how do you knew Rachel?"

"We went to high school together, and we recently met up a few days before Sarah's death." Quinn said making Ellie stiffen.

"Oh, well that's nice." Devon smiled.

Quinn remembered they didn't know Rachel was still a spy and they didn't know she knows.

"Rach I didn't know you went by Chuck, why?" Quinn asked she really didn't know.

"My full name is Rachel Charlotte Bartowski." Rachel replied.

Quinn smiled she thought it was beautiful.

Later on after they all ate dinner Rachel and Quinn excused themselves, but Ellie caught Rachel's wrist. "Chuck, you can talk to me."

"I'm fine...really Ellie I am." Rachel plastered on a fake smile shutting the door behind her and walked beside Quinn.

When she opened up her door she saw Morgan asleep in his old room, and stopped in front of her room.

Quinn took her hand "I'm here."

Rachel nodded taking a deep breath and slowly opened her door to see her room exactly the way it had been for years except Sam's things in the closet that took forever to get in there were gone.

Rachel looked at Sarah's old suite case that Morgan probably thought was Rachel's and slowly opened it. It was two pictures of them one of their wedding day, and another of then on top of a canyon with her arms wrapped around Sam's waist as she kissed her cheek smiling. She looked down to see her old iphone she had left here. She picked it up and smiled sadly at all the pictures of her and Sam. Quinn sat next to her silently till Rachel went to the next photo, and she laughed.

Quinn's eyes widened.

Rachel out her phone down "Sam kept going on missions, and well Morgan sent him a photo of me waking up and Sam sent me sexts."

"Oh." Quinn smiled softly.

"We better get some sleep." Rachel said standing up and putting away the suite case.

Quinn waited for Rachel to climb into Sam's old spot then laid in Rachel's old spot.


	4. I Grieve

**song I Grieve is by Peter Gabriel okay so this one so pretty short**

**"To Wish Impossible Things" ****Chapter Two 'I Grieve'**

_**It was only one hour ago/ It was all so different then/ There's nothing yet has really sunk in  
Looks like it always did/ This flesh and bone/ It's just the way that you would tied in/ Now there's no-one home  
**_

"Chuck, come on sweetie it's time to get up." Ellie cooed brushing back Rachel's hair. Everyone including Quinn was dressed in black.

Rachel wiped the sleep from her eyes and sadly nodded.

She got up with Ellie holding back her tears; this was more hard then she thought it would be.

"I got them ready for you sweetie." Ellie said softly showing the black dress Rachel had worn to her father's funeral.

"Thank you." Rachel whispered.

_**I grieve for you/ You leave me/ 'so hard to move on/ Still loving what's gone/ They say life carries on/ Carries on and on and on and on**_

Ellie led everyone out as Rachel clutched her heart silently holding back sobs as she slowly got dressed, and did her makeup.

Everyone was silently sitting down in her living room staring at the hard wood floor.

"I'm ready." Rachel said quietly.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The cemetery was piled with agents that they had worked with more than once all standing still, stern.

Members of the _'Buy More' _standing awkwardly sniffling. Then there was her family. Sam's dad with red rimed eyes and expressionless face staring at his daughter's casket. Her old friendenimie Carina standing with a cold face. Devon nervously looking for his wife. Morgan who had tears in his eyes, and hidden feelings for Carina. Quinn who watched Rachel who stared at the brown casket.

_**The news that truly shocks is the empty empty page/ While the final rattle rocks it's empty empty cage/ And I can't handle this  
**_

As everyone dropped a rose down on Sam's deep brown casket Ellie walked up with Jamie in her hand resting his cape on top then silently walked to Rachel, and took her hand.

"Samantha Lisa Bartowski, was a hero to this country. A wife, a friend, a daughter. She cared about others enough to put herself in danger, and with that may she rest in peace." The Rabbi said. "Chuck? Would you like to be the first to put her to rest?"

Rachel raised her head. Sam's dad Jack walked up putting his hand on her shoulder and gave a sad smile then went ahead dumping dirt on the casket._**  
**_By now everyone had their turn but Rachel. Quinn walked back squeezing her hand, and gave her a lingering kiss on the cheek.

Rachel squeezed back then let go walkig to the 7 foot deep hole and dropped the two pictures Sam had told her she never went anywhere with out. As the silent tears fell with the pictures she let go of the dirt slowly feeling each grain as she let it slip on the photos.

_**I grieve for you/ You leave me/ Let it out and move on/ Missing what's gone  
They say life carries on/ They say life carries on and on and on**_

Everyone shook Rachel's hand along with Jack's as they took their leave.

"...I'm sorry." Carina whispered taking Rachel by surprise, and walked away. Carina never cared much about anything._**  
**_

When the green field mostly cleared out Rachel walked over to Jack. "I'm so...sorry, I should have-"

"Now you hold it right there sweetie. There will be no 'I should have's' or 'What if's'. I never knew about Sam's real job till the day you told me, but I understand why she did what she did. I ruined her life and you gave her hope. Chuck your a great person, don't beat yourself up."

Rachel nodded. Jack patted her shoulder again he wasn't much of a hugging man or rather an emotional man; he was a con man. "Alright then darlin' you move on, and live life likes it's supposed to be lived."

Rachel watched as he walked away to his El Camino, and drove away. _**  
**_"Come on sweetie let's go." Ellie whispered taking Rachel's hand, and leading her in the limo.

When Rachel made it home it was just her and Quinn. She sat alone on her bed staring at the floor.

When she remembered sweet memories of her passed wife.

"Rachel." Quinn said softly resting her hand on the brunettes back. "Come on, let it out.

"I can't." Rachel said below a whisper.

"Why not?" Quinn asked.

"Because spy's don't cry. Spy's can't show weakness."

"Rachel, it's not good for you. Let it out, I promise I won't tell." Quinn said feeling light shakes from Rachel.

Quinn pulled Rachel too her holding her as Rachel let out her first sob in a long time.

_**I grieve for you/ You leave me/ Let it out and move on/ Missing what's gone/ They say life carries on/ They say life carries on and on and on**_

_**Did I dream this belief?  
Or did I believe this dream?  
Now I can find relief  
I grieve**_


	5. I'm Not Letting You Go Again

**To who ever stuck with this fic I am soooo sorry for the lack of updates! But thank you for sticking with it.**

**"To Wish Impossible Things" Chapter Four 'I'm letting you go again'**

Rachel slowly opened her eyes seeing Quinn sleeping soundly. The spy looked down to see that they were in fact tangled together. So very gently Rachel untangled them and got out of bed. Shel stretched herself before grabbing her work out clothes and shoes, heading towards her bathroom.

Once she was dressed she left a note by Quinn's phone and walked to her kitchen seeing Morgan and Alex eating cereal.

"Chuck." They both smiled. "Morning."

"You want something to eat Chuck?" Morgan asked getting up.

"No, it's fine I think I'm just gonna go for a run. Don't want to get all flabby." Rachel chuckled grabbing a bottled water.

"Are you sure? We can play the new Call of Duty game I got." Morgan smirked.

Rachel laughed knowing he got Casey to get it for him. "Maybe after buddy."

"Alright...D-Do you want me to go with you?" Morgan stuttered he never worked out. Ever.

"Ten miles?" Rachel asked raising her eyebrow.

"...Yeeaaa sure." Morgan squeaked.

"No it's cool buddy." Rachel laughed walking out the door.

Morgan sighed dropping his spoon in his bowl.

"It's okay sweetie just give her some time." Alex said taking his hand.

An hour later Quinn awoke stretching and feeling Rachel's side to see if it was warm or cold. She sighed feeling it was cold and got up seeing the note on her phone.

_Hey Q, went for a run be back later._

_ -Rach_

Quinn gathered her clothes and went to the washroom to take a much needed shower. Once she was done she heard voices in the living room and made her way to it.

"Oh...hi." Morgan smiled pausing the game he was playing with his girlfriend.

"Hi...Um where's Rachel?" Quinn asked looking around only to see the man who was with Rachel and Sarah. "It's just been a while for a run."

"Oh well knowing Chuck she's probably still working out in Casey's exercise room. It's how she avoids stuff well that and playing video games." Morgan blurted out.

Alex smacked him on the arm. "Don't say that say, clears her head." Alex looked up at Quinn. "He means she clears her head that way."

"I meant that." Morgan chuckled and cleared his throat.

Casey snorted and put down his newspaper. "My place is to the left I'll take you so you don't get zapped."

"Dad!" Alex hissed.

"Oh, okay well thank you." Quinn said walking towards the door.

As Quinn and Casey walked to his apartment Casey spoke to her. "Look Bartowski is a good person. She's just a spy and spies dont' do well with emotions...So go easy on her." He gruffed and nodded.

Casey growled hearing music come through his door. He unlocked the door pushing in the security code.

"She's all yours. Just be careful her music is too long so she might think your the enemy." He chuckled then stopped and smirked. "You know what I'll go with you."

Casey walked in slowly watching his screens of Rachel hitting and kicking the sandbag.

'_So what if you can see the darkest side of me No one will ever change this animal I have become Help me believe it's not the real me Somebody help me tame this animal I have become'_

He hit a code opening a secret door as the song changed to another stupid song he didn't know. So slowly he walked down telling Quinn to lay low.

Quinn saw Rachel sitting as if she was meditating till her eyes widened at the lashes across the brunette's back, but Quinn had to cover her mouth at the sight of Rachel slowly lifting her self up on a board of nails in front of her.

The blonde found herself...turned on. The sight of Rachel's taunt washboard of a stomach with beads of sweat rolling down her bronze skin as she slowly did push ups on the board of death; did things to Quinn that made her fantasy's look shameful.

'_(When this began) I had nothing to say And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me (I was confused) And I let it all out to find That I'm not the only person with these things in mind'_

Rachel slowly did another push up and as she went back down she let one hand go behind her back.

'_(Inside of me) But all that they can see the words revealed Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel (Nothing to lose) Just stuck, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own' _

Quinn gasped holding her heart as Rachel flipped over throwing Shuriken's (Chinese throwing stars) at Casey who clashed some down with a long wooden staff and some got stuck on it.

'_I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long _

Casey smirked at Rachel who smirked back as he tried to swing at her and missed. Rachel swiftly kicked his legs making him fall as she caught the staff.

_(Erase all the pain till it's gone) I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real I wanna find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong'_

Rachel smirked holding it down to his throat and backed off letting him get up.

'_And I've got nothing to say I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face' _

"Again." Rachel demanded throwing him the staff.

'_(I was confused) Looking everywhere only to find That it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind' _

Quinn watched Rachel started doing back-flips to grab another wooden staff on the wall.

'_(So what am I) What do I have but negativity 'Cause I can't justify the way, everyone is looking at me' _

Rachel and Casey walked around each other slowly.

'_(Nothing to lose) Nothing to gain, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own'_

Quinn watched in awe as Rachel and Casey began fighting with the wooden staffs.

'_I wanna heal, I wanna feel What I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long (Erase all the pain till it's gone)I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm close to something real I wanna find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong'_

Casey hit Rachel's staff to where it flew from her grasp. He smirked and threw his to the ground.

'_I will never know myself until I do this on my own And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed I will never be anything till I break away from me I will break away, I'll find myself today'_

Rachel chuckled and beckoned Casey to her with her fingers.

_I wanna heal, I wanna feel What I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long (Erase all the pain till it's gone)_

"Wow.." Quinn whispered watching the two spies begin fighting each other just like how she saw in movies.

'_I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm close to something real I wanna find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong _

Quinn moved her eyes back and forth as Rachel threw a spinning kick to Casey's face then quickly elbowing him down.

'_I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong Somewhere I belong' _

Rachel kicked up the staff smirking as she held the end to Casey's neck once again. Rachel threw the stick helping Casey up.

"Chuck-me." Casey said out of breath.

Rachel chuckled grabbing two towels from the cabinet tossing one to Casey.

"You can come out now Quinn!" Rachel called out startling the blonde. "Casey you know better than to try and sneak up on me while I'm working out. And for you to bring Quinn here? I could have accidentally killed her."

"I told her to lay low." Casey shrugged and winced at the ache in his spine. "I'm gonna go and take a shower."

Quinn checked her mouth making sure no saliva had been left on the side of her mouth. "You-You were amazing."

"Thanks." Rachel chuckled wiping her face, and smirked as she saw Quinn staring at her abs. "Do you still like French Toast?"

Quinn snapped her eyes up to Rachel's blushing for having been caught staring, and nodded her head.

"Alright come on I'll make you some." Rachel said running up the steps.

* * *

While Rachel took a shower and got dressed, Quinn looked around at Rachel's room. Seeing an old _'Tron'_ poster, collectible action figures, guitars, old photos of Rachel and her sister, dad, and friends. And one she didn't expect. A group picture of New Directions.

"Hey thanks for waiting." Rachel said walking out smiling.

"You kept it?" Quinn asked softly lifting the picture.

"Well...Yeah." Rachel laughed. "I could never forget any of you."

"They never forgot you, you know." Quinn said back. "None of us did. Everyone was freaked out when you left. We couldn't find you." She laughed softly. "I remember getting so mad at Mercedes and Kurt when they tried to create a funeral for you after a year of nothing."

"I'm sorry I hurt you, but-"

"You had too." Quinn finished for her. "Will you see them again?" she asked with hopefulness in her voice.

"I-I don't know Quinn. It might be dangerous." Rachel answered.

"Rachel, it's Lima." Quinn huffed.

"They all stayed there?" Rachel asked softly.

"No- Well Finn thought it was way to long for all of us to be apart so he thought we should all come back to Lima. For Puck's birthday." Quinn answered.

"...If I say no you're still gonna hound me about it aren't you?" Rachel gruffed.

"Yes." Quinn answered.

"I'll think about it!" Rachel said raising her eyebrow. Seeing Quinn's pleading face was doing things to her that happened back in high school. Wanting nothing more than to please the blonde.

"That's all ask." Quinn raised her hands in defence. "Even though it would mean alot to everyone especially Puck if you went."

"Oh don't you do that to me Quinn Fabray! Don't use the guilt trip on me!" Rachel said walking out of her room.

"Please Rachel?" Quinn begged.

"That stuff might have worked in high school Q, but I'm an adult now, and a spy!" Rachel said walking into the kitchen.

"What's up?" Morgan asked pausing his game.

"Nothing!" Rachel snapped.

Morgan turned to Quinn.

"I'm trying to get her to go to our glee club reunion in honor of our friend Puck." Quinn explained.

"Puck the guy who passed?" Morgan asked his best friend who briefly nodded and went back to cooking.

"Ooooo buddy!" Morgan beamed trying to hop over the couch but failed. "I'm fine! Chuck you have to go!"

"Why?" Rachel asked raising her eyebrow.

"Because they are your friends and care deeply for you." Quinn answered.

"Duhhh what she said!" Morgan blurted out.

"Uhhhhhhaarrrrrrrrrrr! When is it?" Rachel snapped slightly turning her head.

"In about a month." Quinn blurted out.

"I don't even know if I'll be working or not, and neither do you Quinn. You just got promoted!" Rachel said fixing the french toast up on a plate.

"Well I actually I was wondering if I could talk to you..." Quinn looked at Morgan. "Privately."

"Oh! Okay well I'm gonna go and talk to Alex. Bye Chuck." Morgan said walking out of the door.

"What did you want to talk about?" Rachel asked Quinn setting the plate in front of her.

"Well I was kind of wondering where you'll be..." Quinn said digging in.

"I don't really know anymore...I love New York, I do, but Burbank is my home. Anyways it wouldn't be my decision it would be up to the General to decide where I will go." Rachel answered watching Quinn eat. "Why?"

"I just got you back Rachel...I'm not letting you go again." Quinn said.

Rachel gave her slanted smile before asking. "So how do you like your food?"

"It's actually really good." Quinn beamed.

"It's the only thing I know how to make, and I don't even like it." Rachel snorted.

"Why do you make it then?" Quinn asked softly as she ate some more.

"Um...Well when my mom and dad were still together it was either on fathers day, mothers day, valentines day or their birthdays when Ellie and I would make their favorites, and that was my dad's favorite." Rachel laughed smiling. "Ellie would always make mom blueberry pancakes. Hers always looked so much better than mine, but dad always ate it all and told me it was his favorite." Rachel smiled looking down at the table.

"That's sweet." Quinn smiled.

"Did you and your sister ever do that sort of stuff for your parents?" Rachel asked softly.

"Actually yeah." Quinn chuckled sitting up straight. "Frannie and I would usually go to baseball games with our dad or stay at home and cook with our mom. I know it doesn't sound that fun, but it felt good to be a family in those moments."

"'It sounds fun." Rachel nodded smiling. "So have you been in California before now?"

"Yes to find you because one guy got really, really close but then he told me it was a dead end." Quinn responded.

"Oh...Well you found me now so how about I show you around?" Rachel smiled.

"I'd like that." Quinn chuckled. "I'd like that alot."

**A/N: I know this chapter was horrible and I don't know if I should continue it or just delete it.**


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